101 Weird Things about Living in Germany.... Explained 5 Years Later

101 Weird Things about Living in Germany.... Explained 5 Years Later

LivingInGermanyExplained

In 2015, I wrote ‘100 weird things about Living in Germany’. And now, my friends it is 2020! These things below which I found weird, and had trouble getting used to are now, in fact, kinda normal to me? Many of them have explanations, so as an anniversary to 5 years since writing this article, I will now go through each point and provide reasoning and explanation. Let’s see if any of these make more sense. I can’t say I still agree with them all, though. 

1. Paying for mayo and/or ketchup with your meal

Well, because nothing extra in Germany is free. Obviously, if you want mayo as an addition to your fries, you’re going to need to pay up. Maybe they don’t trust their customers that they wouldn’t take advantage of free mayo and they’ll steal the bottle or something.

2. Paying for a disposable fork with your meal

Goes with the above. Nothing extra is free in Germany. 

3. Sleeping with separate blankets in a double bed

It probably lowers divorce rates. Not romantic at all. Although, there are no fights in the night about ‘stealing’ blankets. Very efficient, like (most) Germans. 

4. Mattress split into two (someone always ends up in the hole)

Like above, two people have very different senses of comfort, so why doesn’t each person get to pick their own mattress and sleep on it? Might as well get separate beds too, if you ask me (on top of the separate mattresses). Again, takes the romanticism away from sharing a bed. Suck, it up to people. No one wants to be stuck in the middle of the bed. And no, a love bridge is not romantic either (that’s a piece of fabric which bridges the beds together… )

5. Your pillow is an 80 x 80 cm giant square and you only get one

Ha. These pillows and I have a love-hate relationship. They can either be fluffy/firm and amazing or a piece of crap that doesn’t provide any support. Some people fold them in half and sleep on them, and turn them into the size of a normal pillow. I don’t get it.  I am still not sure about the explanation of these giant pillows, but I would prefer American size pillows any day. However, you can’t find this size so easily, or the pillowcases. So, giant pillow it is. 

6. Dogs are allowed in restaurants and stores

WINNER for all the dog lovers out there. This makes having a dog a lot easier when your dog can accompany you to a restaurant, cafe, etc. The dog doesn’t need to be left in the car! This is great, and I appreciate all the dogs I get to lovingly stare at. However, this is only allowed if your dog is well trained, which is the norm for owning a dog in Germany. Doggies, go to dog school and sit quietly and nicely in cafes in return. 

7. Dogs are allowed off-leash in public areas

Goes with above. Dogs are well trained so you can almost trust them to also walk off-leash on the streets. This would scare me if I owned a dog, but dogs here seem pretty independent and street safe. Go, doggies, go!

8. In the afternoon you see Grannies eating giant bowls of ice cream alone

Grannies living their best lives. That’s the only explanation.  I think in North America we are sometimes too focused on trying to be healthy and eat the right things, but sometimes you just need to sit down, relax and eat a damn ice cream sundae. Just like the German Grannies do. 

9. Cake and coffee is an acceptable lunch replacement

It is an acceptable lunch replacement if you can control your blood sugar levels, but like me, I can’t eat cake for lunch. I will become hangry and need to eat solid food asap. However, maybe if you were raised on the cake it would be ok. Cakes here are amazing though. Just like the German Grannies eating ice cream, we also can just relax and eat a cake too.  It doesn’t need to be someone’s birthday!

10. People love ice cream cones in all weather conditions

There is always a little ice cream shop open all year. Maybe it’s a European thing, but a scoop of ice cream is often acceptable here at any time, and the trendier the place, the longer the ice cream line. 

11. Opening windows on a hot bus/train or any public place could lead to rude stares or comments

Yes, people don’t like when it’s warm on a train/bus and you open the window. But I’ve stopped caring and do it anyway because I don’t believe in the next point below…. 

12. Because fresh air is lethal and can give you bad neck pains

There is a rumour that if some fresh air hits your neck for a period of time, you will get a sore neck. I don’t believe it. This causes office arguments and rude glances when you open a public window.

13. Na? Is a common greeting and you must reply back with Na? in the tone of how you feel.

‘Na.’ I like it. Shortens the bullsh*t when asking ‘How are you’, and you actually don’t really care. 

14. You do not ask people how they are or they will tell you the truth. 

Well depends how German the person is, most English speakers realise this is just like ‘Na’ above. Or else you will actually know how they are... And sometimes it isn’t pleasant. 

15. You must introduce yourself and shake hands with everyone at a party/get-together. Not doing this will result in awkwardness.

It depends on what kind of party I am at, but this is still true. Very hard to remember everyone’s names. But does break the ice a little. 

16. Currywurst is a very popular dish with wieners mixed with ketchup and curry. 

Germans are very proud of this strange, but delicious dish.  They might tell you it’s spicey, but it’s not… at .. all. This best one is in Hamburg above the U1 at Jungernsteig.

17. It is common to eat a dinner-sized meal for lunch and only a sandwich for dinner. 

Yes.. eating ‘warm’ at lunch is very popular. Eating three warm meals a day contains extra fats and makes you fat, so the German’s say. I still eat warm twice a day though, and so do many other people. However, Abendbrot (Evening bread) is quite efficient and can be healthy depending on the bread and toppings you select. 

18. Walking around with a coffee from Starbucks isn’t cool

Actually, coffee culture has changed in the last 4 years, and it is now cool to grab a coffee at one of the local artisan roasters and go for a walk or hang out there. Still not as popular as it is back in North America though. 

19. Grocery clerks sit and don’t bag your groceries

Do you want to have a friendly conversation with your grocery clerk? Ask about how their day was? Talk about the newest food items? Try it and see what happens - questionable looks will probably happen. Get in, get out, don’t bother anyone. Oh, and make sure to for the love of g*d please put your divider down after you are finished putting your items on the band, or you’ll probably get a dirty look from the person behind you.

20. You have absolutely no time to bag your groceries and pay until the next person’s groceries are on top of yours. 

Exactly, ready to battle. Tote bags open, cash or card ready, all hands ready! No diddle-daddling here. Beware if you take your time with this, you will again get a dirty look from the person behind you. No patience is allowed in Grocery Checkouts. Can’t we all, just, relax?

21. Men are more publicly affectionate

I am not sure if I still agree with this. German men are, yes, affectionate, but they will not hit on you first in public (usually).  Maybe they are not afraid of showing their soft side because some are metrosexual and embrace their feminine side more often.

22. You have to be able to take criticism and not be offended

I appreciate the straight-to-the-point culture a lot more now that I am used to it. No time wasted, feedback is clear, get on with it. I’ve become more this way as well. Perhaps it has even hardened me up a bit but in a good way. 

23. Rules are rules – their way or the highway.

Just stop. Some of y’all need to be a bit less stubborn. Not everything is black and white, and shouldn’t be. Everyone has a right to their opinion and should not be criticized when they don’t agree with yours. This part of the culture still irritates me, as you can probably tell. 

24. Germans usually keep their social life away from their work-life

Seeing friends from work on the weekend?! What a thought. This is mostly true. It depends if you work in an international company or not, if it’s more international it could be that you see your colleagues outside of work. If it’s super german, you might see your colleagues at the Christmas or Summer fest... Or the occasional office beer. Work is work and life is life. It can be really boring if you’re in a company like this. 

25. You don’t need a helmet to ride a bike (don’t worry Mom I still wear one)

Still true. And sorry, Mom, I stopped wearing one ages ago. I think its okay as most of your biking is on controlled sidewalks and not in traffic. 

26. You have to watch out that you don’t get hit by a bike when walking on the sidewalk

Yes, those red lines are there for a reason! I don’t mind sharing the path with a bike, as long as I know which side I have to walk on. 

27. You have to pay for a public toilet (but they’re super clear)

It’s ok for me as long as I am paying for something clean, makes sense for me. 

28. You may have to pay for a toilet in a bar (don’t worry you can buy an all night toilet pass)

Again, at least the toilet is clean!

29. You probably won’t have a closet in your bedroom or much storage at all. 

True, but this gives you the flexibility to pick what kind of storage you want, and not deal with an old, flimsy built-in closet. PAX for the win!

30. Beer is the same price as water at a restaurant

Yes, and I’m still not sure why. 

31. You will get rude looks if you ask for tap water

Yes, but I do it anyways now, what are they going to do??

32. And they will probably bring you mineral water anyway and charge you for it!

Still happens, yep. 

33. You have to pay the rental agent commission when you find your apartment yourself

This is no longer the case, they changed this a few years ago, so it is much more affordable to change flats you are renting. YAY.

34. Germans are always prepared for the weather

And now, I am always prepared, too! Hint.. look at the weather before you leave the house and dress/pack appropriately. In case it snows, pack an umbrella too.. because that makes sense.

35. It’s not acceptable to wear leggings as pants unless doing sports (unless your 15)

With Leisurewear becoming more popular since the rise of Lululemon in Germany, it is starting to be more acceptable. However, I still hear people say they are too embarrassed to wear their leggings on the train on the home from the gym... PSST. Embrace it, ladies!

36. There will always be someone better dressed than you

Yah, that’s for sure. My style has changed a lot since living in Germany. I definitely look way more presentable when I go out in public, just because the sweatshirt/sweatpant look is often saved for homeless people. 

37. Most lunch food comes in to-go “noodle box” boxes.

The really cheap lunches do… I was an Intern when I wrote this! Now I can afford real lunches, most of the time…

38. Doner is acceptable to eat at all times

No, it’s not, it’s only acceptable to eat after partying. But I did write this when I was 25. Sometimes I eat it for lunch when I need something cheap. 

39. French fries are called ‘Pommes’

They are also called this in the Netherlands and France. We are just weird for calling them ‘french fries’ 

40. You can’t take a sip of your beverage until everyone has his or hers and you say ‚Prost!’ 

I still like this rule, it’s nice to wait and enjoy the first sip together! 

41. Don’t even think about taking a bite of your food until everyone has theirs

I also like this rule, it’s nice to finally enjoy your meal at the same time. Especially if you are a slow eater/fast easter.

42. A Christmas market is an appropriate place to get drunk with friends

Glühwein (Mulled Wine), Gives the WORST hangovers. I am still sick of it from the last 4 years. 

43. Going out in the weekend probably means you won’t be home until 5am-1pm

I’m 29 now, going out to party means being home in bed at 2 am. Those were good times though. 

44. Capirinha is a very popular cocktail

This has now been replaced with the in-famous, ‘gin & tonic’.  Capirinha, sucks.

45. Men aren’t afraid to get cocktails together

Yep, they meet for fancy cocktails like the ladies do. No shame involved. 

46. Men have more than one pair of shoes

True, my previous German partner had way more shoes than me. 

47. Men probably dress better than you

And they look in the mirror longer than you too. 

48. The door key turns the other way to open than in Canada

And now I turn the key the wrong way in Canada. 

49. They eat pizza and burgers with a knife and fork.

No mess for the hands. That’s true. Italians also eat Pizza with a knife and fork, so we (in North America) are actually doing it wrong. 

50. They always use a knife and fork when eating (fork in left hand)

My cutlery holding skills are great now. I’m a knife and fork wizard. 

51. You’ll have to pay for your food at a restaurant even if it was gross and you didn’t eat it

The customer is not king in Germany. Service people are king. You come to our restaurant, they make the decisions! 

52. The German language is fun to learn and doesn’t sound angry! 

I made it to B2. It was fun while it lasted. Still sound like a young confused child.

53. Your flat will most likely not have an elevator

And paying your friends in Beer to help you move, is simply, not enough.  I avoid getting any new big furniture for the fact that I have to find someone to carry it up 6 flights upstairs.

54. White Converse are cool always

I would say these have revolutionized into White Adidas.. Or white anything. Just go with white shoes, you’ll fit right in. 

55. They open presents for Christmas on the 24th evening

Yes… and Christmas lasts a whole month! Presents every day in your advent calendar, Christmas Markets, then actual Christmas. They LOVE christmas.

56. If you have a statutory holiday on a weekend, too bad - you don’t get an extra holiday in the week

Okay, but you do on average get 30 work holidays per year, so I guess that would just be too much to offer that, too. 

57. Don’t think about crossing the street at a red light

I’ve been trained. 

58. How dare you if there are children around

And I’ve been yelled at by parents. 

59. You can do a master for free as an international (many are in English) 

Hasn’t changed. Take advantage of this!!

60. Potatoes are not a breakfast food

They are however food for every… other… meal… 

61. Breakfast consists of a boiled egg, fresh buns, meat, cheese and Nutella

And AMAZING bread, spreads, vegetable toppings, fish.  I actually really enjoy German-style breakfasts now. 

62. There are 9 grocery stores within a 1km radius from our place

That doesn’t mean you’ll find everything in one store, because, the stores pick what they like to have in their stores. Finding special items usually consists of looking in 2 -3 stores.

63. There are over 6 bakeries in a 1km radius as well

True, but hard on the figure. Gotta love them Brötchen (bread rolls)! Sunday morning, they’ll be a line outside the door, everyone needing their fresh-baked whatever. Getting it the day before is just not appropriate.

64. There is a towel warmer in your bathroom (awesome in the winter)

Everyone loves a warm, dry towel in the winter. 

65. There is always a soccer game to watch

Chasing balls like it’s fun to watch. Unless its Fifa world cup.. then I pretend.

66. At the hockey games, a litre of beer is 6 euro (8 cad)

I haven’t priced checked this in a while, still could be true!

67. Kale is not a cool trendy food, it’s only cooked with fat and wurst during the Christmas season

It’s REALLY hard to find kale in a small package, it’s not meant for salads here.  You can buy a kilo of Kale and if you can use it all before it goes bad, I am proud of you.

68. German TV can be very cheesy, but they love their game shows

German TV is over-saturated and very cheesy. I avoid it.  What is with the weird music played behind different TV shows that never matches the emotion? I am the only one who notices this?

69. Windows open from the top and not from the side

Better for the wind I guess. However, I thought I once broke a window because I couldn’t open it from the side, and it opened from the top. I then pretended as nothing happened and left it and walked away… learned it wasn’t broken later.

70. There is 6 versions of The (Der,die,das,den,dem,des)

I gave up. I just go with one and continue on my sentences. 

71. I think even some Germans don’t get them right

Or pretend that they do..

72. The trains aren’t actually always on time

Almost every train I’ve taken across the country has delays.  Deutsche Bahn is not efficient, don’t be fooled.

73. Healthcare is not actually free and is very expensive (from a Canadian view) 

It comes off of your paycheque, there is no getting away from it. It is quite a lot. 

74. Mixed-gender sauna and steam rooms.

Still odd, but somewhat freeing? Being without a bathing suit is a must ‘because the fabric in the bathing suites releases toxins…’ Really though? Never seen so many naked people in my life.

75. Being naked just isn’t a big deal

You could go on a butt naked vacation if you feel like it!

76. You have to stare at each other in the eye while saying ‘cheers’ (Prost auf Deutsch), or it’s bad luck

I’m used to this now, and feel slightly offended when someone doesn’t look me in the eyes before drinking.

77. Fleishsalat – sliced ham with mayo & pickles, common breakfast spread. More delicious than it sounds.

I don’t like this anymore. It was yummy, but now it’s gross. 

78. It is also popular to eat raw ground pork on bread in the morning (mett wurst)

Also yummy, but also GROSS 

79. They’re really good at recycling – bottles can be returned at all grocery stores for an easy cash refund

They also like to recycle glass, sorted by colour, electronics, paper, plastic, basically, anything can be recycled easily.

80. You’re not allowed to put your feet on other seats in front of you

I mean this was weird at first, but really, who wants to sit on someone else’s shoe grudge?

81. On your birthday you have to bake your own cake

Because it’s your birthday, you have to celebrate yourself, so YOU bake the cake.. Weird? Yes! I still hate baking! No one is getting a homemade cake on my birthday.

82. On your birthday you are expected to pay for the drinks

 Birthdays break the budget, fast, it sucks you have to save up for your birthday. However, it is fun to treat your friends! 

83. Woman’s cake baking skills are on par

Not mine though.. Not mine.

84. They’re ridiculously on time, you better be ready.

I am always on time now! When I go back home to Canada, I get annoyed at my friends who are late!

85. Movies are all dubbed in German, yes James Bond does not have an English accent in Germany. 

However, 5 years later, more and more movies are coming out in English only. This is a better way.

86. Popcorn is sweet at the movies theaters, butter popcorn does not exist

You can also get salted popcorn, but it’s not as good as butter popcorn. By the end, your tongue is kind of numb from salt. Where the butter at??

87. Water is always drunk with bubbles (at first you hate it and then you love it)

… And now I hate it :)

88. Men shave their armpits

It’s just culturally normal I guess. 

89. Craft beer is just starting to become cool

And now in 2019.. Craft beer is COOL. There are fancy Craft Beers stores everywhere.

90. Everything is closed on a Sunday

Hasn’t changed.. Will they ever catch up to the rest of the world? Probably not cause… its Germany. 

91. Sundays are dedicated for long walks and eating in restaurants/cafes

Or Netflix and pizza. When the weather sucks. You can’t cross anything off your to-do list on Sundays. It’s the ‘day of rest.’ 

92. If you’re a man, single and turn 30 you must find a virgin to kiss, and you have to clean up a mess in front of city hall

Still a very weird traditon. 

93. If you’re a woman, single and turn 25 you receive old boxes (Because you’re an old box ;) )

And this too… 

94. You have to pay extra to have your hair blow dried at the salon

Yes, unless you find an American style hairdresser, you’ll walk out of there with wet hair or pay an extra 25 euro.

95. Mail comes on a Saturday

I actually really enjoy this. Among everything else. Makes online shopping easier!

96. Credit card Is widely NOT accepted

It is slowly but surely getting better.. More up-beat places to eat are taking credit card, finally. 

97. If you don’t have cash you might as well starve

Yes.. you still need cash. Especially for lunches out of the office and going for drinks.  

98. When you call a customer service line you have to pay per minute to get help

And the help won’t be very good. See point number 51. 

100. You can take cocktails to go, right from the bar

When I was 25 (When I wrote this) this was much more appealing. Now, wine-to-go or Beer from a kiosk is more up my alley. 

101. No matter how weird I think things are, they still accept my weirdness and me!

To be honest, I don’t feel weird anymore. I feel like I can fit in when I need to, and not fit in when I want to. I am a chameleon in this foreign land :)

*NEW* 102 . Wow, you made it to the end! Fitting in in Germany is hard, right? It took me 5 years to figure it all out. 

So… Let me help you :) 

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